It's been a week since I bought my copy of Modern Warfare 2, and I'm still in disbelief. Not at the game, or its intense quality, nah who cares about that, I'm still in disbelief at getting ID'd at Tesco when I bought it.
I'm 25 years old, I haven't been ID'd for about 5 years, I look 25, I act 25, I smell 25, I am depressed 25.
Worst thing is, I worked at this Tesco for 6 years, and the person that served me worked there at the same time as me. Okay, she works on tills and I was part time on dairy, but still, its a supermarket...surely she recognised me. Even worse, she is a pretty hot 20-something year old, not some grandma with dementia or something. And yet she didn't remember me. Sigh.
Another epic fail with the ladies. I recently read an article that stated that 50% of people had sex with someone they met on the tube. Seeing as I ride it every day, I thought I'd try and get some use out of it.
I began eyeing this hot girl wearing FMBs (fck me boots for you illiterates), she looked greek, she was looking a little vulnerable...perfect. I catch her eye, she looks scared. Maybe its not scared, maybe she's surprised. Yeah, give it another go, a cheekay look. The guy sat next to her gets up and gets off the train, she says "come sit next to me". My eyes almost pop out of my head, and in my moment of shock, I see another guy sit next to her. And they kiss. Ah, she was speaking to her boyfriend. FFS.
Not to worry, I have some girl who I met at a gig a few weeks ago chasing me on facebook, its her birthday next week, she's invited me etc. I couldn't quite remember what she looked like, and browsed her facebook fotos. She resembles a white rat. I hate rats. But still, why not get drunk and do it.
Well...I smoked a little mersh, and then had the most fucked up dream. I dreamt I met rat faces family, and her brother says to me "You're a good looking guy, why do you bother hanging around my sister?"
I then woke up, and felt sick. Even her brother is repulsed by her.
Not sure she has a brother tbh, but once I dreamt it would rain, and awoke to see it was raining, so I trust my dreams.
Not to worry, I'll think of something new...back with an update after the weekend, I have a good feeling I'm gonna pull a fat bird
edit:
In relation to my day to day bizzness, I've not played much poker lately...been concentrating more on writing and stuff. I've begun writing a couple of pieces a week for goal.com, my latest an article on Queiroz and Portugal. I've also worked a bit on a short story I've been writing, about someone losing control...I'm actually really pleased with my writing, it's advanced greatly in recent years. That's a plan for the weekend, I want to get at least 4 hours writing done, that'll leave me pleased.
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5 comments:
She resembles a white rat.
Brilliant line!
Email the short-story, I'd be interested to read it.
Cheers
Wow, that post jumps around a little!
I lol's at the rat face too.
Could you link us up please sir.
www.raisetheriver.blogspot.com
We will return the favour.
Thanks
RTR
Just think of rat face as a novelty shag, novelty shags excuse most things....works for me ;)
LOL at being ID'd. I'm 28 and look 28 (fuck off Amatay before you start) and I got ID'd in my local Asda by some crazy old fucker they'd obviously taken off trolly duty for an hour.
Worse still she started asking me how old I thought she was and as I was about to say 60 she told me she was 43 to which I replied, "I'd not have thought that" and fucked off sharpish
I'm 37 and got id'd buying skins at the Spar a few months back.I was delighted!
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