Got ID'd at the supermarket...WTF

It's been a week since I bought my copy of Modern Warfare 2, and I'm still in disbelief. Not at the game, or its intense quality, nah who cares about that, I'm still in disbelief at getting ID'd at Tesco when I bought it.

I'm 25 years old, I haven't been ID'd for about 5 years, I look 25, I act 25, I smell 25, I am depressed 25.

Worst thing is, I worked at this Tesco for 6 years, and the person that served me worked there at the same time as me. Okay, she works on tills and I was part time on dairy, but still, its a supermarket...surely she recognised me. Even worse, she is a pretty hot 20-something year old, not some grandma with dementia or something. And yet she didn't remember me. Sigh.

Another epic fail with the ladies. I recently read an article that stated that 50% of people had sex with someone they met on the tube. Seeing as I ride it every day, I thought I'd try and get some use out of it.

I began eyeing this hot girl wearing FMBs (fck me boots for you illiterates), she looked greek, she was looking a little vulnerable...perfect. I catch her eye, she looks scared. Maybe its not scared, maybe she's surprised. Yeah, give it another go, a cheekay look. The guy sat next to her gets up and gets off the train, she says "come sit next to me". My eyes almost pop out of my head, and in my moment of shock, I see another guy sit next to her. And they kiss. Ah, she was speaking to her boyfriend. FFS.

Not to worry, I have some girl who I met at a gig a few weeks ago chasing me on facebook, its her birthday next week, she's invited me etc. I couldn't quite remember what she looked like, and browsed her facebook fotos. She resembles a white rat. I hate rats. But still, why not get drunk and do it.

Well...I smoked a little mersh, and then had the most fucked up dream. I dreamt I met rat faces family, and her brother says to me "You're a good looking guy, why do you bother hanging around my sister?"

I then woke up, and felt sick. Even her brother is repulsed by her.

Not sure she has a brother tbh, but once I dreamt it would rain, and awoke to see it was raining, so I trust my dreams.

Not to worry, I'll think of something new...back with an update after the weekend, I have a good feeling I'm gonna pull a fat bird

edit:

In relation to my day to day bizzness, I've not played much poker lately...been concentrating more on writing and stuff. I've begun writing a couple of pieces a week for goal.com, my latest an article on Queiroz and Portugal. I've also worked a bit on a short story I've been writing, about someone losing control...I'm actually really pleased with my writing, it's advanced greatly in recent years. That's a plan for the weekend, I want to get at least 4 hours writing done, that'll leave me pleased.

The Bloggerment....Hi Amatay

I played Sunday night 9pm UK time on stars, you fish should all play, its 5doll and the secret password is donkament.

I play to learn from the great one Amatay.

first hand of the tourney, I get to duel with the master

PokerStars Game #35401548863: Tournament #210992952, $5.00+$0.50 USD Hold'em No Limit - Level I (10/20) - 2009/11/15 21:00:04 WET [2009/11/15 16:00:04 ET]
Table '210992952 1' 9-max Seat #1 is the button
Seat 1: Al Eleven (1500 in chips)
Seat 2: Joppa Rd (1500 in chips)
Seat 3: NoCash25 (1500 in chips)
Seat 4: 1tripz1 (1500 in chips)
Seat 5: weegem (1500 in chips)
Seat 6: Bossanova21 (1500 in chips)
Seat 7: simonjjj (1500 in chips)
Seat 8: Kronsdat (1500 in chips)
Joppa Rd: posts small blind 10
NoCash25: posts big blind 20
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to Bossanova21 [7d 2h]
1tripz1: folds
weegem: folds
Joppa Rd said, "seems like a nice boy x"
Bossanova21: raises 40 to 60
1tripz1 said, "how do you play this game"
NoCash25 said, "if u get an ace u have won"
simonjjj: calls 60
Kronsdat: folds
Al Eleven: folds
1tripz1 said, "ok"
1tripz1 said, "ty"
Joppa Rd: folds
NoCash25: folds
*** FLOP *** [Ks 5c Qh]
Bossanova21: bets 87
NoCash25 said, "2s are wild"
simonjjj: folds
Uncalled bet (87) returned to Bossanova21
Bossanova21 collected 150 from pot
Bossanova21: shows [7d 2h] (high card King)
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot 150 | Rake 0
Board [Ks 5c Qh]
Seat 1: Al Eleven (button) folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 2: Joppa Rd (small blind) folded before Flop
Seat 3: NoCash25 (big blind) folded before Flop
Seat 4: 1tripz1 folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 5: weegem folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 6: Bossanova21 collected (150)
Seat 7: simonjjj folded on the Flop
Seat 8: Kronsdat folded before Flop (didn't bet)


Oh wait, wrong hand.

HAMMER TIME


I noticed amatay bring back the min-raise. It was like 2006 all over again.

So I myself brought it out. remember, min-raise = nuts

77 = the shizzle

PokerStars Game #35402876739: Tournament #210992952, $5.00+$0.50 USD Hold'em No Limit - Level II (15/30) - 2009/11/15 21:25:00 WET [2009/11/15 16:25:00 ET]
Table '210992952 1' 9-max Seat #3 is the button
Seat 1: Al Eleven (888 in chips)
Seat 2: Joppa Rd (1370 in chips)
Seat 3: NoCash25 (1735 in chips)
Seat 4: 1tripz1 (675 in chips)
Seat 5: weegem (1395 in chips)
Seat 6: Bossanova21 (1870 in chips)
Seat 7: simonjjj (2747 in chips)
Seat 8: Kronsdat (1320 in chips)
1tripz1: posts small blind 15
weegem: posts big blind 30
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to Bossanova21 [7c 7d]
Bossanova21: raises 30 to 60
simonjjj: calls 60
Kronsdat: folds
Al Eleven: folds
Joppa Rd: folds
NoCash25: calls 60
1tripz1: calls 45
weegem: calls 30
*** FLOP *** [3s 9d 5c]
1tripz1: checks
weegem: checks
Bossanova21: bets 30
simonjjj: folds
NoCash25: calls 30
1tripz1: raises 585 to 615 and is all-in
weegem: folds
Bossanova21: folds
NoCash25: calls 585
*** TURN *** [3s 9d 5c] [7h]
*** RIVER *** [3s 9d 5c 7h] [7s]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
1tripz1: shows [9s Qs] (two pair, Nines and Sevens)
NoCash25: shows [9c Td] (two pair, Nines and Sevens - lower kicker)
1tripz1 collected 1560 from pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot 1560 | Rake 0
Board [3s 9d 5c 7h 7s]
Seat 1: Al Eleven folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 2: Joppa Rd folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 3: NoCash25 (button) showed [9c Td] and lost with two pair, Nines and Sevens
Seat 4: 1tripz1 (small blind) showed [9s Qs] and won (1560) with two pair, Nines and Sevens
Seat 5: weegem (big blind) folded on the Flop
Seat 6: Bossanova21 folded on the Flop
Seat 7: simonjjj folded on the Flop
Seat 8: Kronsdat folded before Flop (didn't bet)

epic fail fold

Then that fish JR fluked it somehow, when his pauper JJ sucked out against my AK, and when he called 12 bbs after my shove with AJ, with KTs

yeah wp fish.

then he hits a K on the river.

RIGGED.

Oh, btw, I have a chat ban on stars, hence my silent nature...i think it still has 2 weeks to run, sigh

So close...now what?

Yesterday was like some kind of doomsday, with wind, storms, and whatever else making it feel like it was 7pm at 1pm. To combat such a depressing sight, I smoked some mersh and headed off to buy a pot noodle.

Watched the england brazil game, and was throughly bored as I had expected. I had planned to go watch the game in The Court on Warren Street, a ghey bar inhabited by students. Or in my delusions, a ghey bar inhabited by nympho late teen girls. I had planned to go down, watch the game, and rush back for the portugal bosnia game. After seeing the weather, and smoking the mersh, this plan went out the window as you expect.

Portugal won anyway in case you care. Quite lucky though.

After the game, I loaded up a few tarbs, and went deep in a 6-max $5 5k gtd on stars, finishing 17/1900 when I was down to about 12bbs, and shoved my pocket Qs into a limped pot pre-flop, only to be snap called by someone with AT, who obviously hit his A and it was gg me.

I was actually kind of annoyed the whole time, because I really wanted to sleep, and by this point it was 4.30am, and I only got 4 hours sleep, for a total $20 profit i made last night. Nice.


I kinda fcked up in that tourney, not on the QQ hand, but about 2 blind levels before, I lost 30% of my stack on a weird river call, where my tripps were no match for a flush, and it moved me from having a workable stack, to having to tighten up a bit, and in the end shove shove.

In other news, I really want to find some stuff to do on weeknights. Sick of wasting my time playing poker. I usually work Monday-Friday, not doing much in the evenings, and then get wasted weekends to try and forget work. What an existence, the capitalism dream. Keep the population so occupied they don't offer any resistance...

Anyway, I'm thinking of joining one of those ghey book clubs, but I'm worried it'll be full of OAPs and the like. I don't mind the odd GILF, but tbh, its not my scene. I've also thought about taking some kind of evening course, maybe writing or a language course. Ok, you got me. I'm basically seeking ways of meeting more kinkay birds. Not the type you meet in bars, where the word filthy means they are lager lout bitches with no intelligence. Nah, I mean those type of fcked up women that make me feel normal, and good about myself.

It's nice to find people worse off than you, doesn't make me feel so bad when I go to sleep at night.

Any of you fish recommend any wholesome evening activities? And no joppa, I don't have a 4x4 or a forest near by, so thats out the question, although you do seem a caring lover...

CoD Modern Warfare 2 will cost me £100 or more...

I don't even play computer games, but the hype about this one, and the fact that CoD is one of the few games I actually like, forced me to buy it.

So I heard Sainsburys had it for £26, and rushed there, but sold out.

I also knew Asda had it for £32 or something, so went there. The thing is, I never go to Asda and they've re-done the whole area recently, so as I was driving there, down some dark unfamiliar road, where all street lights were out, I turned right into the road I thought led me to Asda.

Oops, wrong road, it was some bus lane thing, instant ticket. Sigh.

Got to Asda, sold out.

Sigh.

So now when I finally get my MW2, it'll have cost me at least £100. The worst thing is, I pretty much turned onto that road again after discovering it only led into an industrial estate, realised it was a fking bus lane, and reversed out. I must have only driven a 2 or 3 metres onto it, anyhow if I get 2 fking tickets ARRRGHHH, the thought is enough to life tilt me.

I'm seriously pissed.

fk u dvla or whoever puts these cameras. fk u sainsburys and asda.

I've also seen loads of people getting £50 fines outside my workplaces for throwing cigarette butts on the floor. What?? Who decides the price of these fines? 50 fcking beans for a fag end? fking wankers. If I get a ton in fines, it'll be nearly 10% of my monthly wage, and i earn about national average. Imagine those poor sods at tesco or somewhere, these fines are ridic.

rant over/

Infomercials and all that

I really need to stop watching such awful television, my most guilty pleasure is watching infomercials when I'm baked or drunk.

The other day, I saw this one, and I was ridiculously close to buying this:



lol.

Spending 40 quid or whatever just because I'm too lazy to chop stuff up. My favourite bit is when he says "Look at this tuna, its boring, stop eating boring tuna and having a boring life. Lets slap and chop, this is an exciting salad, you're gonna have an exciting life".

Haven't been up to much lately, I've really slowed down the amount of poker I play, because I have lost my interest in the game, and coupled with some other interests of mine, I'm struggling to find time to play. I played a few tourneys yday, and broke even. I played the $5r on stars, and was 200/400 when my JJ ran into a short stacker with AA, and then when 320/370 I shoved Q9s on a limped board, and was called by 88, flop came 9sTxJs, turn Xx, river Qx

sigh.

Went to Westfields shopping centre with a friend yesterday, and basically we 'dreamed the dream' by spending the day walking around and window shopping. I hate shopping centres, but I hadn't seen this friend in a while, and he called me asking if I wanted to go Westfields, have a look around, grab a bite to eat etc.

So after a couple of hours of checking out shirts, suits, trainers, jeans, and even furnitures at Next, we went to some all you can eat Chinese buffet place, where after a plate and a half I felt my stomach rumble discontently and decided that unless I want to spend the night on the porcelain I should stop there.

Ended up back at my local pub with my mate, and had a few pints. This pub is probably one of the most boring pubs in London, and doesn't even have sky tv. So we sat there and watched the X-factor whilst moaning about stuff, and lamenting past opportunities. My friend is one of the worst offenders for this, everytime we meet, it kind of leaves me looking at myself introspectively and depressing me tbh. By 9.45pm we were the last people in this pub, and decided that it was best to leave as the night was fail.

On the way home I bumped into another friend, who was completely baked, and we sat under a bus-stop smoking and discussing money making techniques, and global conspiracies. This guy is one of those people that just excites me tbh, whenever I bump into him I get a surge of optimism, and the fact that he is completely bonkers just makes things more interesting. He started by discussing his job, his plans, and then swiftly moved on to tell me about a book he's writing, on work-place motivation and how he was sleeping with some ugly girl from a publishing company with the hope she'll sort something out. He then started talking about global conspiraces, the NWO, something about 2012, and a bunch of other federal conspiraces. Not sure where the conversation went after that, but by the end of it for some reason I had agreed to go out on some double date with some 'not very attractive polish girls', he had a plan for these girls too, i think one of them works in an estate agents, and thats his dream job apparently. Whatever.

We smoked some more, I walked home in the rain, and decided that I needed to be more pro-active in life, stop wasting my time gambling, stop spending so much time on the net, and spending money drinking in my local and get out there and do something.

After eating a hastily made cheese sandwich, I sat down and spent the next 4 hours losing money on pokerstars and watching youtube videos.

Nights out, something smells like...

Another week, another weekend. Yay. Went out with some work-mates last night, I don't have much in common with most of them, but am quite good friends with a handful. So first off we went to this indie bar which was the same place that had previously refused me entry because my mate was wearing shoes.

I hadn't even planned on going out, but after a day full of headaches due to the intensely boring and high volume work I had to get through, I decided to go out for a couple...yeah you know how that usually ends up. I really wanted to get home to watch the FC Porto match though, and also QPR my second team were playing. Anyway, got carried away, next thing I know its 8.45pm, and it takes me an hour to get home, so would miss the match anyway.

To make things worse I found out that Porto drew 1-1, and QPR lost 2-1, both at home. Sigh. I got quite upset that Porto drew lol, it means Benfica bastards can go 5 points clear now. I sometimes wonder why I care so much...

Anyway, let me start again: I left work at about 6.30pm, then after two or three drinks I decided to go watch the football, a couple of girls I work with said they were leaving too, then as we were outside one got a call from her mate who works down the road, she was at a bar with female workmates from some consultancy. My workmate asked if I wanted to accompany her to the bar, fk the footie I though, and off I went.

Got there, and tbh I was dressed quite trampish for the citay, I had an old tshirt, jeans and trainers on, whilst everyone else was wearing shirts/suits. But whatever, I was still getting a lot of attention from her workmates, asking who I was etc. I'm never quite sure when girls do this if it's cos they want to find out if I'm fking their workmate, or if they wanted a bit of rough ;-)

I didn't get to find out, because my friend kept displaying some kind of cockblock tactics, and would keep fkin dragging me from their clutches and talking to me about whatever shizz she had one her mind. I don't mind too much, I actually find her quite cool...and definitely would tbh, but she works on my team and thats trouble imo. So anyway, towards the end of the night, it was still quite early tbh, my workmate and her friend were like "we're going home now, you staying?". lol. I could hardly stay there with her work mates, who had stopped showing my much attention, probably cos they thought my workmate - aka the cockblock - was my missus or something.

So I left too, and they went their separate ways, and I did too. Not even a hint of an after party or another pub. Sigh. They are good girls. Y'know the type. Brush their teeth twice a day, get their 5 fruit and veg, never taken drugs, never indulged in anal. Y'know the type.

All is not lost, I reckon I should be able to get another crack at those consultancy girls soon, seeing as they work so close, and this time I'm not leaving early, I'll just get a mate to tag along with me and when the von trapps go home, I can still stay without looking like a leecher...

So as they headed to their abodes, I decided to go to Burger King. Fkin £7 on a BK meal, I got some double angus crap...man, why do my eyes get bigger than my stomach when drunk...

After that went home, and took a massive dump. Now the relevance of this, my dumps have really started to smell badly. I first noticed this in the summer, when I visited Portugal. Before this, my shit smelt of roses imo. Since Portugal I've really struggled to be in the same room as my stools, which is a bit of a problem tbh. The first time it happened, I almost choked, but somehow got through it. I imagined that it was just a temporary problem, maybe too much superbock and presunto or something. But no, the smell didn't dilute. Eventually it weakened (or I got used to), but then I visited Delhi, and yep...the beast of a smell returned. Even now, my shit just doesn't smell like my shit, so either I got worms or some shizz, or I'm losing the plot :S

Either way, I'm considering the addition of a gas mask next to my copy of Argos I like to browse whilst visiting the porcelain palace...

Anyway, its halloween, and its annoying. Got kids knocking and trick or treating. where the fk did they come from? this is the first year ever. anyway, lucky for them (or for me) i got some chocolate.

Problem is, Im feeling like having a quick wank before I got out later, just to empty the tank, and I don't want to get started only for a kid to knock on the door trick or treating. Imagine that, answering the door with a boner...

:S

I think I'll just have to forfeit the wank and go out with a loaded gun...

sports betting

Got a bit fed up of poker tbh, I am unable to play enough volume (because of work etc.), and so end up playing a handful of games a week, and really getting annoyed when busting lol.

I need to stop playing ridic freezouts with 3k+ players, and sticking to re-buys (where I tend to go deep) and smaller field sngs/mtts.

Anyway, I decided to start getting back into my sports betting and have already made a 100% return on my sports betting fund :)

I shortlisted some selections this weekend, and all of them came in, shame I didn't back them all. Here were my selections:

Layed Man Utd at 2.5 vs Liverpool (2-0 pool)
Layed Leixoes at 2.8 vs Setubal (1-0 setubal)
Layed River Plate at 1.7 at HT vs Boca (1-1 ft)
Backed porto at 1.7 to win on 60mins vs academica (3-2 win)

Selections I considered and tipped others to do, but didnt do them:

Lay Man City at 1.49 (I thought they'd sneak a win)
Lay Arsenal at 1.5 (decided the arse were due a bad result, but couldn't bring myself to do it)
Back Milan vs Napoli at evs (Milan are super dodgy, and proved it, but somehow won)

I also always like to lay really short odds, and almost layed Bolton vs Everton when they were 2-0 up...

I layed benfica at 2-1 vs nacional (they won 6-1 lol, i just hate benfica though)

And tonight, layed Sporting on 85 mins at 1.1 vs guimaraes, a 93rd min equaliser by guimaraes WOOOOOOO

Good stuff, I often lay in running, but I'll see if I can be bothered to give any selections end of week.

I'm currently eyeing a lay of Juve tomorrow vs samp, but the price doesn't appeal greatly to me. It's an option though...